Forum #1: How can you learn to behave, if you're never punished?

    The article I chose from the parenting website Aha! Parenting, argues for and encourages readers to adapt or implement a positive and peaceful parenting model in order to raise empathetic, emotionally healthy and well-behaved children. Contrary to popular parenting methods such as utilizing time outs and punitive consequences, Dr. Laura Markham, author, parenting expert and clinical psychologist of Columbia University, offers in her argument an alternative of guiding and coaching rather than controlling. She differentiates between punishment and discipline, suggesting that parents set limits but always with acknowledgment and understanding of kids’ feelings. Her argument proposes that by following her manner of parenting, punishment is not needed thereby leading to behaved, compliant and positive children.

    The construction of the article begins with an interview with her own now adult children in which she illustrates how children learn to be good without being punished. This offers personal testimony as well as builds credibility in the author in that she is speaking from real experience as well as from a professional perspective. She then goes on to propose and further explain the specifics of the argument by drawing on explanations of the psychology and how it impacts kids cognitively in addition to their emotional development. Finally, she concludes with three positive outcomes of utilizing this methodology. Throughout the article Markham offers links to research that support her argument, which to me is vital in building a strong and well-supported argument.

    For me, Markham effectively used pathos, by creating real life scenarios that many parents find themselves in, which draws on the “Mom/Dad guilt” response as to the long term consequences of punishing your children. Rather than shaming though she acknowledges the difficulty of parenting making her more relatable and likable. Her inspiring words invoke a sense of “I can do this” as well as reaffirm the love and connection to your own child. Aside from her impressive credentials, ethos was most effectively implemented by her relating, empathizing and connecting with me as a reader. I found myself thinking “she gets it” and “she’s been where I am before” which built credibility and a sense of trust in her.  Logos was achieved in in that her logical argument was successfully constructed and well supported with current research from a variety of sources. Overall, Dr. Markham effectively utilized ethos, pathos and logos to build a convincing argument.


http://www.ahaparenting.com/blog/raising__great_kids_without_punishment